English Comp 101
23 October 2017
Losing My Virginity and How It Changed Me
Growing up as a Christian, I am held to higher standards by myself, my parents, and God. I am not supposed to condone certain activities, such as smoking, drinking, and indulging in sexual activities. My family actively participates in church. My father is a minister and my mother is an usher. My brother works with the audiovisual team, and I am a member of the praise team and dance team. My struggle is accepting my parents, mainly my father, making choices for me. I have never been to a friend’s sleepover or birthday party unless they were from my church, I have never gone trick-or-treating, and I have never had a boyfriend. I had always felt insecure, because I never got to do the things I thought a normal child would do. My father would not allow me to wear certain clothes I liked or go certain places I wanted to go. I felt trapped. It felt as if they were using my life to make up for their past mistakes. They would never let me experience things for myself, just tell me why I was not allowed to do it. This caused years of rebellion and ultimately led to the loss of my virginity.
I am a known to be a flirt. I flirt with almost everyone, but it does not always mean I am attracted to them. In this case however, I was attracted to him. It was early September and school had been in session for a while. There was a new student who many people were talking about. He was from New York. Within a week, he knew all my friends, yet I barely knew him. He was a grade younger than me. He was tall, light skinned, and charming. His accent really drew me in. I would harmlessly flirt with him when we were together with our friends, over the months, but things did not progress until I added him on Snapchat mid-December. We stopped talking in person but would flirt on Snapchat. We never really got to know each other beyond surface level. I am not even sure he knew how to pronounce my name. We went from snapping to texting. We would joke around about meeting up and “chilling,” but I knew what he really meant. We fell off around the beginning of February. I turned eighteen on February 27, 2017. I went out to dinner with one of my close friends, but nothing felt different. I did not feel like a new person, or like I ...