Through out the stages of a relationship, from the initial meeting up through married years men and women never stop lying to and deceiving each other. Though society likes to make us believe that the majority of this lying is done by men, and studies have even proven this to be true. The facts are that these studies can be questioned and proved to be biased and untrue. Another thing is that by looking at the stages of a relationship from the first meeting to dating and up through marriage. It can be said in confidence and without question. Women lie and deceive more during the course of a relationship then men.Through observing men and women during their initial meeting and the conversation that follows, what will be found is that there is almost always some form of deception going on. It is dating this initial meeting that lying and deception are most prevalent. For it is during this period that both men and women will try to impress the other with lies and deception. It is during this stage that critics say men start their lying ways. Those same critics say that it is during this stage that men are only looking for sex and will lie and deceive to achieve their goal. What they fail to tell you is the other side. The fact of the matter is that women will use the knowledge of a men?s physical nature to deceive him. According to author Sally Caldwell;? It is during the period of the first meeting that a woman will use sexual prowess to entice a man weather she finds him attractive or not?. If she finds the man to be mate material she will use whatever means she can to entice him be it truth or lies. If he is not mate material she may still lead him to believe that he is, so as to build up her own confidence. ( ).???It is after the initial meeting, relationships move into a courting or what is known as the dating stage. It is during this stage where lies told by women and men tend to offset each other. For during the dating stage both parties are trying to pursue the relationship and take it to the next level. What we see many times during this stage is that both the man and woman are trying to keep up the deception that was started at the first meeting and are both still trying to impress the other. According to a study done by Ohio State University, during the courting stage both men and women use deception and lies at an equal level. The woman tends to deceive the man in their appearance and the man will use lies to make the woman believe he is more financially stable then he may be (). The reasons for these lies are due to the fact that men are more physical personalities and look more towards appearance and women tend to look for mates that are better suited for long term commitment and marriage.During the courting stage we also see a rise in the amount of deception being uncovered. According to the Science Journal, while dating and learning about each other woman are more likely to catch a man lying. Men tend to pile lies upon lies where as women will tell one lie and stay with it. It is here that women will be looking to see how honest that their possible mate is so they are more tuned into things that may seem untrue (). It is during this stage that men start to become known as liars. Because as they get caught more often society labels them with an unfair stereotype as liars.If the relationship makes it through the dating stage, it will normally enter into either a long term relationship stage or marriage. Physiologist Walter Freeman tells us that once a relationship passes into the marriage arena most lies have been uncovered and though there is a period of adjustment for both men and women. It is after this adjustment that deception and lies begin again ().Once locked into marriage or a long term relationship. Lies and deceptions not previously uncovered will come to light. When this begins to happen both spouses will begin to start looking for lies and deceptions and all the ones that had not been uncovered will start to come to light. Surveys done in 1992 by UCLA showed that 15 % of men cheated on their spouse while only 8% of women did. In a study done by UCLA in 2003 The gap closed considerably, in that study 12% of men admitted to cheating while 10% of women admitted to it (). What these statistics do show is that men are more likely to have an affair, but how correct is It.? In a study published in Psychology Today. Women were found to lie more often in surveys when they believed they could not be traced. In the study women and men were asked about their past sexual experience. Their averages were around 4 partners for a man and 2 for a woman. When asked the same question and were made to believe they were connected to a lie detector it was found that men stayed in the same range while women had their average increase to 3.5 partners (). So what we see is that men when it comes to questions of a sexual nature are more prone to tell the truth where women will tend to lie. So I ask again, how correct is the infidelity study.Where women overtake men in the deception department is during the long term marriage stages. It is here that women tend to start to test their spouse and ask questions in deceptive manners. Questions such as Do I look fat in this and Do you think they are prettier then me? These are traps in which the woman willingly sets a man up to lie. For these questions have no correct answer and will only allow the woman to feel as if she has some type of control. It is this type of behavior that a woman excels in and takes a tremendous lead in deception. Yes it can be said that when answering the question the man is lying. But can you really fault him when the woman is using it as a means to deceive him? Though we can see that both men and women lie and deceive during the life of a relationship, by looking from stage to stage it is obvious that women partake in the lying and deception far more. From the first meeting and up through the marriage. Women will use deception and manipulation to control the direction of a relationship. Furthermore though men may be more prone to infidelity, how truthful are the statistics. Men have always been stereotyped as liars and cheater. But it is not right. The only thing that men are truly guilty of is that they are not as good at lying and deception as women. For women do lie and deceive more they are just don?t get caught. So to everyone out there remember the words of Sir Walter Scott. ?Oh what a tangled web we weave, when at first we practice to deceive.?()
