Self- Verification and Allegiance to Among people with negative self-views, the desire for self-verification can override the want for positive evaluations. For example, people with negative self-views seek relationship partners who view them negatively, elicit unfavorable evaluations from partners, and "see" more negativity in the reactions of others than is actually their awareness of these processes can allow therapists to either circumvent them or actually use them in the service of fostering self-concept change For Ms. W suffering and victimization were in some respects preferable to kindness and concern. Ms. W not only misperceived that Mr. S was unfaithful but also resisted any information that contradicted her misperception and actively sought verification that he was unfaithful. The better he treated her, the more depressed and pessimistic she became [for] she was threatened by a caring and loving partner. She accepted her past abuse as an appropriate reflection of her worth. A challenge to this self-image was a challenge to how she adapted and coped with her victimization people with negative self-views do, at some level, desire praise and adoration; they also want self-verification in the form of evaluations that confirm and validate their self-views. Once people become confident in their self-views, they rely on these self-views...
